Sunday, December 11, 2011

Let's talk Bruno Mars.

Let's take a minute to talk about the singer, Bruno Mars. 

If you don't know who this singer is, he's the guy that sings songs which make most girls make their status a lyric from the song with a  at the end (or a </3 if that's the way they want to let the world know they're feeling). If you're a guy, he's the one that makes your girlfriend have ridiculously high expectations of you, makes your girlfriend wonder why you don't want to catch a grenade for her, or tell her that her eyes, her eyes, her eyes, make the stars look like they're not shining.

Okay, so I'm not just talking about Bruno Mars. This post isn't really even about him, or songs like that.  It's about girls, and how they just turn into Taylor Swift whenever a boy gives them the slightest attention (I love Taylor Swift by the way. Shh Kira). If you're in ninth grade, I can bet you that your boyfriend will not marry you and have a million babies with you. No matter what. It won't happen. Just won't.

I actually feel really bad for boys. Obviously the average guy wouldn't want to bike to your house in the rain with five flower bouquets just so that he can tell you you're beautiful "just the way you are" (maybe i'm being extra cynical, but seriously...sometimes girls just do not look good, and would you rather have a guy lie to you so you can feel all happy and gooey inside?).
Have you guys heard the song "It Will Rain"? Here are some of the lyrics:

"Cause there'll be no sunlight
If I lose you, baby
There'll be no clear skies
If I lose you, baby
Just like the clouds
My eyes will do the same, if you walk away
Everyday it will rain"

What?! When I heard this song my face was like this ("If you ever leave me baby / Leave some morphine at my door" well what a freaking burden! How could you possibly leave him after that?!). Let's be honest, girls do want a guy that is head over heels for them, and it's sometimes sweet to think about. But euughh that would get on my nerves so much, the sense of constant clinginess that comes with Bruno Mars's words...

Why do girls do that? They practically throw their hearts at potential boyfriends, shoving it in their faces, "take it! Please! LOVE ME!" Yuck. Girls, please, take some advice from this girl.

Sorry. This post was kind of whiny and had no structure to it...but that's the order they came out of my brain, so we'll just leave it at that (heeey it adds to voice, right?...right...? No...? Okay).

Hilarious but sadly true:
http://tumblrisforlulz.tumblr.com/post/3315505425
http://community.sparknotes.com/2011/05/25/identifying-the-typical-female-facebooker

2 comments:

  1. I freaking love this post. I hate Taylor Swift though. I lose about 20% of my respect for you (only 20% though usually I would lose 100% but I just like you too much).

    The 5 year old girl made my day.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Bruno Mars makes me swoon just a little bit... And the 5 year old girl is brilliant. :)

    ReplyDelete